I am part of a group of bloggers, all of which tackle bust related issues. When you talk about boobs one thing that is bound to come up is modesty. Every one of us has different thoughts about modesty, and we’ve decided to share them this week. You’ll find viewpoints of a mother, a feminist, an obese woman, a corporate climber and so many more.
Other posts (links to come as they are posted):
Bras and Body Image
Braless in Brazil
Fussy Busty- Nicole
Fussy Busty- Amy
Hourglassy- Off the Rack
Obsessed With Breasts
Red Hair and Girly Flare
That Bra Does Not Fit Her
The Tit Rambler
Thin and Curvy
Weirdly Shaped and Well Photographed
Nothing Ever Fits
So first off, what is a modesty panel? You know those mass-produced camisoles or clip in panels that attach to your bra straps that cover your cleavage? Those are modesty panels. If you are anything like me you get the reason the exist but are frustrated by their very existence. Why does anyone need to have a modesty panel to cover their chest?
The bloggers linked above all address modesty and their ideas. I wanted to address modesty from the perspective of a woman with implants. I know we have all heard the stereotypes, the assumptions that women get implants just to show them off. Well, the assumption and stereotype comes from somewhere right? Sure there are women that want to show them off, why shouldn’t they? But it’s not the only reason women get implants.
Modesty and breast implants…. To some that may seem contradictory. In the eyes of many breast implants only serve the purpose of enhancing a sexual object. Sure, for some that is the purpose. But the majority of women have an augmentation done after having children to restore the volume they lost during pregnancy or nursing. They are not really enhancing anything as much as they are doing what they can to return themselves to what they had previously. These women are taking control of their body image and turning it into what they feel they should be.
The same goes for many other women, women that may not have developed breasts. Surgery to give them breasts, the breasts they have dreamed of, does not change their modesty. Many women who have surgery for this reason actually do as much as they can to hide it. They slowly add padding to their bras, they wear clothing to minimize the chances that anyone would notice. Once things settle back to normal they bring out their normal clothing style.
The reality of breast implants and modesty is that things don’t really change. The woman does not change. If she liked to show off her body before chances are she still will. If she liked to dress modestly before, she probably still will. I still dress the same now. I dress the same as I did when I had nonexistent boobs, as when I wore a 28FF, and now wearing a 28HH. I haven’t felt the need to change things. Some people may find it to be immodest to have my t-shirt pull a little tighter across the breasts or that my v-neck thermal shirts show a bit more chest. But I don’t see it any different then wearing the style of jeans that I love. I’m not a modest dresser or a flashy dresser. But no one has ever had a problem with my fitted jeans, I like to think of them as butt huggers. Why should they have a problem with how my clothes fit my breasts? And why the heck does it matter if those breasts are implants or home-grown?
Do you have a stance on modesty? If you have implants, has it changed how you dress? Has it changed how people feel about how you dress?
I purchased this bra from another user on Bratabase. I’m actually not the first owner, it has made its way through a few homes before coming to mine, four that I know of. If it wasn’t for Bratabase I would never have purchased this bra in the size I have it in. User measurements on Bratabase made it very clear, the cups on this bra come up small. This bra is a 60JJ (28JJ), the largest size that I own. But it is sized small. So far I have a slightly small PL in 60HH and an HP in 60J that fit, so having a 60JJ was quite a surprise for me.
Though it runs small in the cups the 60JJ comes up higher on me then what I like. I’m not sure if this is due to sizing, this bra, or the CHP cut. You can see it looks similar on Voluptuous, but Beautiful. The cups curve in a bit at the top, this also leads me to believe that the cups are a bit higher.
The CHP style has the typical vertical seam construction seen on all Ewa Michalak half cups. The shape and design of this bra is meant to lift and round out the breasts. It’s not as open of a half cup style as the CH or HP. There is more projection in the cup then the HP, so those that prefer the look of a more forward projecting breast should get along fine with this style.
The plaid center bow is a nice touch in the gore, if a bit unexpected. The color of this bra is like a blue periwinkle, so plaid is not what I would have chosen to accent. It works and is cute. It’s definitely not a lumberjack plaid.
There are four sets of three hooks & eyes, great for extending the life of the bra. By the time the bra got to me there was some wear so I cannot tell you accurately how right the band is on a new bra. The inside of the cups are the same black as the HP Kobalt I previously reviewed. It’s a soft comfortable material.
Finally, not pictured are the straps. The straps have a textured embroidery that makes it difficult to adjust the straps. It’s cute, it keeps them from sliding longer on you, but it’s a pain during the adjustment process. The annoyance is worth the trouble though, so take that for what it’s worth to you. Personal preference on the straps.
My biggest complaint has to do with construction. Special order sizes are sister sized down from a bigger size. So this 60JJ (28JJ) has the same construction of an 80GG (36GG). There is no grading down of the cup, the height stays high. No change to the strap placement, they are wider for shoulders on a 36 band frame. Same with the center gore. To me it does not make sense to pay extra for a special order size that is just sister sized down from a wider band. It creates major fit issues. I think that the extra wide wires and the wide strap placement are directly tied to this sizing down process.
When you are between bra sizes. One is too big and the size down is too small. What do you do? Buy the bigger size or the smaller? Does the shape of your breast (or implants) factor into this?
Personally I buy the bigger (usually). I don’t want to encourage tissue migration with the smaller cup. Besides I can put in a stitch or two easier then the can get some extra space.
What about when there are things that just are not perfect with your fit? What are you willing to sacrifice to find a bra that is comfortable and fits enough to wear? I always have a wire that’s too wide, I’ve come to expect that as a limitation for the fit of all my bras. I’m hoping Comexim will fix that, but until then I have emptiness at the sideboob in order to get the proper cup depth.
I want to know what your bra fitting issues are. What do you let slide and what is a no go for buying a bra? Is there an unforgivable bra sin that you commit?
Below is a guest review from B of the Parfait by Affinitas Honey Babydoll. I sent this to B to review, I won it in a Facebook contest, but unfortunately it did not fit. I tried it on and used it for the images in the post The Molded Cup Bra Delima.
This is a review of the Affinitas Honey Babydoll. A friend of mine recently sent it to me to write a review, first off i would like to say that i have never owned a baby doll before, this is the first. My first thoughts on it before trying it on was how cute and simple it was… nothing too fancy and something i would possibly be able to wear to bed on a regular basis. Since having a breast augmentation i have needed to wear a bra to bed every night… 24/7 support my surgeon said, so that is what i have been doing, i am always one for following instructions exactly how they were given. So for the past 2 years i have been wearing underwire bras to bed. It took a little while to find some that were comfortable to sleep in all night long. What i love about this baby doll is that it has underwires… so no need for a bra cause its already built in.
My first night in the baby doll went good, the fabric is nice, nothing fancy. The band is a 30″ and i normally wear a 28″ though i didn’t really mind as i like my band to be a little loose when I’m sleeping so i don’t have to deal with digging wires. Wearing the band on the second hook which is good… i think it would be safe to say that maybe the band runs a little smaller then normal but not by much. I would like to see how a 28″ band fits. The cups on this baby doll are a G and fit me perfectly, no spillage and nicely snug. Usually i worry about falling out well sleeping when the band is a little big for me but no problem there, the girls stayed right in place all night long.
Now since i am use to sleeping in just some undies and a bra i was a little worried about all the rolling around i do and the skirt of the baby doll getting tangled up and making me uncomfortable at night but that was not the case at all. I have been wearing it for almost a week now and i have not once woken up and hand to readjust… I’m not sure why that is as i know I’m one for tossing and turning, maybe its the deep cut out in the back that helps the fabric not tangle? not sure but i like it.
So my finale verdict on the baby doll is that i love it, it fits (for the most part, minus the band being a little big but i expected that) its comfortable and not too fancy that i can wear it every night and not feel bad about ruining some nice lingerie…. And honestly i feel a little sexier then wearing a bra and panties to bed. I think this might be the first of many baby dolls to enter my collection.
A recent study conducted by a French sports medicine professor has launched a bra frenzy. There are articles, tweets, and blog posts all over the Internet. A quick google can have you lost in the purgatory of the interwebs. More recent articles include the surprised researcher’s response.
Here’s the my thoughts when it comes to your implants. Stick with what your surgeon tells you! They know exactly what was done, they’ve analyzed your breasts in detail. I’d trust them over a sports medicine professor, small studies, or anything that is not a peer reviewed study. We just don’t know enough about breasts to say anything conclusively. But if you follow your surgeon’s directions you’ll at least have the piece of mind and confidence that you are taking care how you should be.
With implants you have to consider several things. Type of implant. Implant shape. Fill. Placement. Shell structure and texture. Each of these can change the surgical techniques used and the individuals expected results.
Lets consider placement and the Cooper’s ligament. The Cooper’s ligament is the connective tissue that supports your breast tissue, attaching it to the muscles of your chest wall. By definition it cannot be an actual ligament, ligaments connect bones to bones. That just leaves us with a vague definition of “connective tissue.” Implants placed over the muscle (or under the fascia) can act more like a weight on this ligament. Under the muscle (full, dual plane, or partial unders) all have varying amounts of muscle support for the implants, limiting the pressure placed on the Cooper’s ligament. You need to support your natural tissue, but also the implant, and possibly your muscle. These placements will have different needs for support, not only during recovery but all through the life of the implant.
Another example would be textured anatomical implants vs smooth round implants. Textured implants have a coating over the shell that helps prevent them from sliding down. The texture coating helps lower the risk of bottoming out. Smooth implants do not have this coating. Surgical techniques for placing a textured implant can be different then a smooth implant, same for anatomical vs round. Different surgical techniques and different implant types can mean different needs for support.
So bottom line, there are too many variables to breast implants for a simple study to guide your bra wear. Trust the medical professional that did your surgery, follow their recommendations. They can range from braless, normal bra wear, no wire, wires bra 24/7. What ever they are, follow your surgeon’s recommendations.
A few responses from other bloggers:
You guys remember The Bra Band Project? Well it’s expanded!
Christine from Boosaurus has taken the lead and started The Bra Band Project website. But it has expanded to include any size bra, as long as it is properly fitted. Once wonderful women around the world help populate the site you will be able to view properly fitted bras in any size.
A few site features:
-Search for examples of bra sizes by band and/or cup size
-Include “show sister sizes” when searching for a specific size
-Login using an existing account (google, wordpress, etc)
-Submit own photo(s) directly through the site
-Search through various resources (including bra stores)
But we need help! This project cannot expand without your help and your bra images. The sizes up now are limited to those submitted as part of the original project. So we need your submission, complete with size, submitted through the website or emailed to email@example.com. All submissions will be anonymous. The more submissions, the better the website will be!
I have mentioned bra swap groups a few times before now. I belong to a Facebook buy/sell/swap group. It’s really a great thing because you can sell or trade the bras you thought fit but you find out don’t after you take off the tags. Or even the bras that would be a huge hassle to ship back to another country. It’s bras, dresses, clothes, and all friendly to a busty figure.
I got lucky and snagged the HP Kobalt from the group. It’s made by Ewa Michalak, a Polish designer that makes bras in a large variety of sizes, you can even special order bands smaller than a 28 (30 and above are not special order, certain cupsizes are special order). It is an absolutely gorgeous bra.
HP Kobalt is a half cup bra meant to lift the breasts high on the chest. This bra is a 28J, a special order. That means that it is basically a cup made for a larger sister size, then the band is worked down. Unfortunately for me this causes some fit issues. But as you can see the color and fabric is absolutely gorgeous!
The rose print fabric continues on to the straps which are lightly padded. This makes them very comfortable. Unfortunately because the cups come from a larger size put on a smaller band they are placed too wide for me at the armpit junction. This causes some painful digging in the soft tissue.
Black cup interior shows the three part cups constructed with two vertical seams. These vertical seams are what gives the great lifting appearance in this bra. The CH style is also a half cup with the same vertical seams, but is constructed to be more projecting where the HP is constructed to give more lift with less projection. The CHP, same vertical seams, is a combination style, which I hope will provide the best of both bras.
The gorgeous fabric continues along the back band to the coordinating hooks. The bra has three sets of hooks & eyes. This particular 28J is of average band length. But with special orders the length of the band seems to vary quiet a bit. The band size variances are not limited to this particular bra, it seems that many special order bras have varying band lengths.
You can see that the side of this bra is pulled back by the band. It causes the wires to be too wide and the straps to dig at my armpit. But at the same time the center gore lifts slightly. It is definitely not a perfect fit. Eventually I plan on moving the straps on this bra to give it a better fit. I have an older HP that has this alteration done and it is my most comfortable bra.
I really do wish that the process for making a smaller band bra was more manufacturer friendly. I think that Ewa Michalak bras could be the perfect bra for me, if they were graded down to smaller bandsizes better.
In addition to the bra I also have the matching panties in a size 34 (6). I’m not sure what that equates to in US sizes, but they are a tiny bit big on me. They come up a little higher then what I am used to, but they are comfortable & wedgie free. The fabric is the same rose detailed fabric. They look to pretty to think of as underwear. The entire matching set is beautiful, one that you can let peekaboo in the right setting.
I haven’t posted in a while now, partially because my time has been filled with all things baby, but also partially because there is not much to share. Until recently! Now I’ve got some more great bra things to share, and hopefully some progress on breastfeeding, insufficient glandular tissue, and implants.
Most of my focus has been on breastfeeding. It’s normally a challenge, but add in low supply due to IGT and it becomes more of challenge, to the point of being a daily obsession. Before Gabrielle was born I was worried about what size I would need after milk came in. I didn’t want to buy too much, or really anything. In the same way we only bought 3 bottles, I didn’t want to buy tons of nursing bras when I wasn’t sure how it would work out.
A little searching and I found what is called a transition nursing bra. It’s a super stretchy material similar to that of the Ahh bra or Genie bra. The point of a transition bra is to stretch with your as your breasts change during the early stages of breastfeeding. Sounds pretty perfect? Well it’s, not. But it is useful and it could be useful during the early post op period from a breast surgery.
Meet the Shaparee Seamless Pullover Nursing Bra. It’s a basic sport style bra with tons of stretch. It has a high neck for size increases, wide straps, and a racer back. Please ignore the wear & tear, and the dog hair. I’ve been using the heck out of this bra. Partially because its comfortable (if not very supportive, hence the not perfect), partially because I haven’t ordered new bras and added nursing clasps yet.
Looking at it, it looks like a basic sports bra. It has light compression when first worn, perfect for the early post op period. It is very stretchy, you can bring it up over your feet if needed. The straps are wide, but not very strong so while they don’t dig they do absolutely nothing for the small amount of support they should provide.
The clasp is a normal nursing clasp. I’ve pulled it to the side so you can see the internal sling that joins the cup to the band. I like the wide but stretchy construction of this for the early post op period. It is good because it provides support to the sides if you get the feeling like your new implant is going to fall into your armpit. This feeling goes away as you get used to he new implant, but it can be disconcerting. It is not restricting, it will stretch as you have some swelling. Unlike a normal nursing bra which usually has a side sling with little stretch.
Here is another picture that shows that side sling. Most post op bras are designed to support but stretch for swelling. But I cannot count the number of times post op that I felt really constricted in my bra. It feels almost like these new boobs are suffocating because things just aren’t quite stretchy enough. Now is when a nursing clasp is perfect. Just unhook those clasps, pull the “cups” down and let your new girls breathe. You still have support under the breast from the band, but the slight compression from the cups is removed. (**If you have major pain or swelling changes please contact your surgeon. These are signs of a possible complication.)
So while we all hesitate to grab a “mom bra” for our post op period, this is a type of bra that you really should consider. Many women compare the feeling of engorgement to how their new breasts feel during the post op period. Don’t think of your post op options in terms of a nursing bra, sports bra, or whatever. Think of them in terms of comfort, wearability, and practicality. After all, it is just a bra to transition you through the healing process.
It’s been a while!! I promise I haven’t forgotten about the blog. It’s just been a very busy time right now.
What’s been going on? Really what hasn’t? You all know that Gabrielle was born November 9, but sense then things have been busy. We spent some extra time in the hospital, made a run back to the ER, had our house packed to move, cleaned the house, stayed in a hotel for a weekend with our three dogs (which is insane!), dropped my car to be shipped to Alaska, drove half way across country to visit my parents, my husband drove the rest of the way across country to take the ferry to Alaska (again, insane with three dogs), dealt with buying a house long distance and closing issues, my older sister got married (and managed to pick cute bridesmaid dresses), and a flew half was across country with a 6 week old baby. Add in a good dose of moving, new house, and unpacking stress and you can say that life has been a bit more then what I can chew.
Hopefully things will be settling down a bit now. Yeah, I know, asking a lot with an almost 8 week old baby. But as we speak she is snuggled up next to me, fast asleep on her boob pillow. We are still working on breastfeeding, so more details to come on that. I’ve come to terms with the idea of having a limited supply of breast milk due to IGT (insufficient glandular tissue), but I am still working on trying ways to produce more. So when time (and sleep schedules) are a bit kinder I’ll be posting more about IGT and breastfeeding with implants.
With breastfeeding and the move to cold Alaska I’ve discovered why a padded bra is essential. And they are nearly impossible to come by in a 28J. Because of a wonderful clothing sell/swap page I have the chance to try Ewa Michalak and Comexim. Fingers crossed for a good fit, these poor boobs could use it.
My blog is officially over a year old. That happened shortly after Gabrielle was born so I missed it. WordPress released their yearly blog statistics. The post I published on Gabrielle’s birthday was my most popular post followed by my post about growing up with out breasts. A big thanks to Bratabase, Bras I Hate & Love, and Boosaurus for being my top three referring websites.
I’ve caught up on emails now, a big sorry to those that had to wait for a reply. Feel free to email any questions you may have or topics you’d like to see. I miss the blog world and I hope to back in it as a regular poster soon.
It’s been a while! The last you heard from me I was 39 weeks pregnant and Gabrielle was still sitting stubbornly in a breech position. I’m going to apologize in advance, I sure this post will be a little all over the place. I have a ton of scattered thoughts, and things I’d like to share. So this will be a scatterbrained overview, with hopefully more detail later on.
Gabrielle Rose was born bright and early Friday November 9 by a preplanned gentle cesarean. An ultrasound that morning showed that she was still frank breech. In my part of the US OBs are not trained in breech delivery, so a vaginal breech birth can be more dangerous for baby and mom. A properly trained OB or midwife would normally have no problem doing a vaginal breech birth. I was able see her right away, touch her and talk to her. After a short trip to the nursery while my procedure was finished. Then she came to the recovery room with me. We were able to try to start breastfeeding right away. She seemed to take to it really well. But after that the problems started.
After we settled into our room one of the lactation nurses from the nursery came in to see us. Breastfeeding isn’t one of those things that happens easily, you and the baby have to learn. I knew to ask for help right away. The smallest thing early on can become a problem later, early correction is essential. The first problem we ran into was nipples. There are all types of nipples, unfortunately for me mine are slightly flat. This can make it much harder for the baby to latch properly. They have to work hard to pull the nipple hard enough to get milk to flow. Because of this many women with flat nipples end up using a nipple shield. Just like anything, there are pros and cons to using it, there are supporters and those that do not support their use. Gabrielle is a tiny baby and just couldn’t pull hard enough to get anything. And it took a few days to find this out, and the nipple shield wasn’t helping.
At her 2 day check up (5 days after birth, 2 days after going home) we find out that she has lost too much weight. She is also having problems keeping her body temperature up. We ended up back in the hospital. The lactation nurse immediately got started helping me pump, trying to see how much I was producing. I made sure to tell her about the previous breast surgeries that I had and what my breasts were like before surgery. Based on that and the low amount of milk I was pumping the nurse brought up IGT, insufficient glandular tissue. It is hard to diagnose in a woman who has gotten implants, but it is very likely that I have this and it is keeping me from producing enough milk. The nurse had me pumping to try to increase my supply while we supplemented with formula. I continued with just pumping for a few days before I started feeling it just wasn’t worth it. By the advice of a wonderful friend, I tried to breastfeed again. What they say about hormones releasing is so true, there is just something about it that makes the difference.
Gabrielle is now 4 weeks old. We’ve had some trials along the way. After going home from the hospital the first time we have ended up back twice. We had issues with formula, two road trips (and a third coming), packing a house to move, cleaning, hotel stays, etc. She is a little champ. She travels so well, sleeps where she can, and is eating much better. She still will not nurse at night, she wants to sleep through the night and won’t wake up enough to nurse. But when she is awake she nurses like an expert. She gets the most milk first thing in the morning and right before bed. She is growing and happy, what more can a new parent ask for?
I’m still in the limbo process. In a few weeks I’ll be finishing a move. Hopefully once things get settled and we get into a new baby routine I’ll be back to blogging more. I know this was a scattered post, I hope to address a few things individually in future posts. I’d like to talk about early nursing bras, flat nipples, IGT, nursing with implants, pumping with implants, and who knows what else. Like always, if there is anything you’d like to see feel free to email, message me on Facebook, or comment below.